So the Universe is really making a point. A very clear and definitive point surrounding the emotional response of Fear. Today is October 7, 2017. 1+0+0+7+2+0+1+7=18= 9. Universal and cosmic forces colliding energetically enforcing the test of fear. It's messy. It's chaotic. It's knowing that the only thing I can control is my perception of what may and chaotic feels like and moving into flow. I think I do pretty well at flow. Yet this week I feel I've been tested on this in particular. Did I pass?
I reached out to my friends recently. They assisted me in refocusing my Being-ness energetically. Assisting me to remember that all that is currently happening in our galaxy and Universe is perfect.
I can feel fear has been rising in every fiber of me. Analyzing all that I was experiencing was really getting me down. Why was I feeling so in my head? Why was I feeling so in my body? Why was I dealing was so much self doubt? Why was I feeling worry or even dread? That's not really like me.....I've been there, done that...got the T-shirt's and been to the BBQ's. Oh...but wait!....There's more....
Well fuck that shit. Ya I'm done with that. I'm done with the last vestiges of said fear. I really don't have the fucking time for this.
Since 2012 we have all been in the cosmic wringer if you will. Those feeling their calling to be prepped for their mission(s) and aligning their individual lives to accomplish this have been through - well like a re-birthing really. A fiery compression of bones, muscles and tissues, every cell in our bodies has ached, felt over stretched, pushed, pulled and expanded beyond what is comprehensible.
Activating the DNA to assist with codes and keys for unity consciousness and ascension.
On a cosmic note looking at the practical line up of the planets today, this week and this month and this year, the energy of the epic solar flares integrating the electromagnetic masculine and feminine of all that...we should we not be wondering why we are dealing with this re-current level of physical crap. It's pretty clear we are dealing with the last of the mirror of fears within. As we move closer to uncovering our innate selves on deeper levels, we also uncover our power our potential and our under cover missions.
Which we process, acclimate, integrate and align with.
We stand firm in our power... remembering who we really are.
Balancing, clearing, transmuting and moving through the energies of Scotland have been intense. Although initially I felt the energy of the city we landed in and made home (Edinburgh) was fairly weightless and perhaps too familiar. It was just a few days of walking countless kilometers (as we literally stopped counting after our first day was 9 kms and the next day was 16 kms) that I started to feel it. In my body. Nearing the end of our days as regular 'tourists' the pain in my body was getting to be unmanageable. I could feel my lower back had locked up on one side and this would mean the sciatica pain had me crying at the Stirling Castle and another day just before arriving at the Roslyn Chapel. Like a domino set off the rest of my mid back and neck with pain and stiffness. My backpack although a loaded purse, was becoming increasingly like a 100 pound sac of cobble stoned bricks and I was really resenting that feeling. I was in Scotland! How can you stay back to rest? I really needed some down time to be off my feet as all of my muscles, joints and bones were screaming at me "Are you insane"? Do you not love us anymore??? The process I was going through was like doing the Iron Man yet having only trained for a half marathon! I was in shape...yes. As I am an avid ridiculous motorcycle enthusiast I had ridden the Valley and mountainous region a lot this spring/summer I thought I was good.
So I reverently decided to not go out by the 9th day. I was done. I needed to just BE. I required processing. Like a software upgrade, it seemed as though there wasn't sufficient time before the next major energetic upload was happening, and thus the energetic 'pile up' of harmonizing and aligning myself with my damn mission was totally bringing me to exhaustion. ' Houston we have a problem...I'M DONE!'
I didn't want to stay behind while my divine colleagues went out exploring the unique 'time traveling' excursions yet I was down right concerned to keep pushing my body physically and energetically so fucking hard. This shi(F)t is hard work. I pushed. I went out despite how I felt. I walked very damn slow. I medicated with Tylenol and Ibprophen and a beer where I could. I stopped. I cried in pain. I was held and loved and supported, as I continue to be. I am post- travel almost a week now. I cold turkey'd the pain meds upon returning home as that had started a nasty rebounding migraine. The exhaustion coupled with jet lag and insomnia is wearing on my nervous system.
Although I could do without the pain so I can jump back 'into my life'....I realize that this forces me to stay quiet and go within. Process. Transmute. Heal. Clear. Upgrade. Write. As a Libra I also automatically analyze my process. Checking in on all levels - why is the pain present? What do I require myself to look into? What is going on within the etheric and myself? What emotionally is going on that I have to deal with or haven't dealt with? Some of this is mechanical I reason. Yet I ask myself and my highest self...have I done my due diligence and turned over every rock on my path? How or is this process of mine relevant to the big picture? Is this a reflection of what humanity is dealing with? So many other questions enter my periphery. So much is happening on the planet right now. "And breath. Relax....This will be all transmuted and better very soon...You're not alone...All is well." I know the answer to every damn question I pose to myself. There is work to do of my own. I'm owning it. I will process and get into my genius zone. This is what I do. This requires diligent work and organic and authentic self examination with no judgement. Zero point. Being open and vulnerable to all that you are in the tangible avatar and as equally important the ultimate soul growth which is why most of us creatures on this planet are looking to achieve, is easy - just get past EGO first.
That's what I'm getting.... so....Oh and it's called 'Work'. I'd insert an 'lol' here....if I could. Shushh your mind L.
Travel is my 'work'. Humanity is 'My Business'. So I am extra gentle with myself these days. Extra compassionate. I am doing all the self care I can think of and 'manage' at this time. Sea salt baths, crystal work, daydreaming, smudging, writing, meditating, hypnosis, Reiki and connecting with my heart, my highest incorruptible self and my Goddess sisters.
I love my work - even if it's like recovering from a marathon gone sideways.
I'm so grateful to have had this ridiculously amazing experience Scotland - the good, the bad and The Spectacular.
An ominous eerie sight suddenly appears on the horizon as I walk toward the Forth of Firth. Ships now docked here once being used in their own specific ways line the harbor inlet. Working ships. Mechanical, gigantic, rusted and lonely. Far different yet uncannily the same in design than the ships of long ago. No sails, no cannons, no scurvy. No menacing captain barking fierce orders. No slaves trapped in lower cabins awaiting the hopes of life anew but really certain death and sorrow. "Where there is life there is hope" they say. Not in those days. Comparing the two era's separated by centuries I can't help but feel sad looking at the harbor now. What has changed? Yes, metal and steel fabrication has changed and diesel engines now power these fierce beasts. The deep water just off shore marked with chain link fence makes me feel uncomfortable. No gradual beach here. No sand and not a friendly shore. It's dark cold water has a sad history. Many ships only left shore just a few kilometers out then promptly sank leaving a trail of whatever family or friends had remained on shore wrecked as well. There are places out here where you are not permitted to travel near or to scuba to due to the wrecks. Everything was lost. Treasures, lives, hopes and dreams drifted to the bottom of the North Atlantic.
This is a working harbor although not a busy one. Just meters further down marks the spot of the famous Royal Yacht Britannia. Which was out to sea at the time.
Are we still not slaves of our own era? Slaves to the J.O.B with the B.O.S.S. Slaves to the car payment, the mortgage and our busy schedules. All neatly organized on our smartphone. When is our time our own? When do we schedule in nothingness? Doing nothing is healing, rejuvenating and a spawn for inspiration, creativity and change.
These old ships - some do nothing now. Looking past the eeriness of this harbor into the deep ocean of secrets and mystery, I am reminded about freedom, exploration and the art of taking a step back and doing nothing.
As for me - I choose FREEDOM.
Stepping through the castle gates feels as though you've just stepped through a portal. Not so much back in the time physically but more energetically. All different nationalities and languages bombard my senses in a way making hard to believe my reality. I-phone and Android devices abound as these have replaced the medieval swords and horse halters. Backpacks and designer purses are donned on all the clean and fresh travelers. A far cry from what it was centuries and millennia's ago when a fresh daily shower was unthinkable.
A sense of sadness surrounds me as my divine colleagues and I embark into a portion off the Castle's center square. I fight back tears. "This is sad... just sadness, only sadness".... is the actual sentence running through my head. So. Much. Death. So much destruction. I check in with the others with a head nod. I hear them echo the words "so much sadness." You see.... they could feel it. We are all empaths and intuitives. Each of us with our respective lives in the Matrix. Two of us are incredible artists, Leona, The 'Love Expert' from Divine Beauty who creates these experiences and myself. All of us are Mothers, Healers, Friends, Humanitarians, Earth Activists and Goddess Warriors for the people.
Today at this Castle we are not the warriors of old. We bring the Light. We bring Divine Love and Divine Healing.
We are the Rainbow Warriors. In alignment with each other yet more importantly within ourselves.
My luggage in on a 3 day sojourn in London, without me. No sooner do I gather myself together after clearing spaces and feeling through much of the Castle;s Square then to receive a text regarding the wayward suitcase. It was going to be delivered to our apartment in an hour! It's gonna take a bit more than a hour to make it there before it does that is if we hoof it hard and get on the bus asap. Two stay behind as we had just really begun our tour.
Is there a chance the courier delivery guy is gonna be late? Oh, Yes. But if you're not there at said time - Who knows?...Another day without it or a trip back to the airport.
We marveled at how fast we were 'ejected' out of that Castle. Why the abrupt need to leave we were asking our guides and Higher Selves. What was the real rush? Okay there was a tall creepy Italian dude that kept showing up. Was that the reason? Had we done all the work needed at this time?
As Leona had predicted the luggage was late 2.5 hours after the delivery text stated. The guy got lost and the story is a bit more complicated....Sigh*.
But ya....Like really?
There were halls and rooms dedicated to war etc...that I would not enter. I can do what I need to do from where I am at. I thought. One in our group after thinking to herself she wouldn't go in either, was intuitively guided to do so anyways. She came out in tears. She was held. She was supported physically and energetically until she felt like she could dare to move.
A remembering. Grieving now due to her vision inside, it was clear to her why she needed to enter. A healing. A letting go. Clarity. This is what we do. We shine. We love. We change and we shift ourselves and each other. We clear and we heal then we move on.
Lost in the past. That is where we left it. Clear on our Path. In Edinburgh. The Castle.